“Constructive criticism is
the process of offering valid and well-reasoned opinions about the work of
others, usually involving both positive and negative comments, in a friendly
manner rather than an oppositional one.” – Wikipedia -
When you’re a
fledging writer you will probably receive two kinds of input. The first is constructive criticism and the second is unconstructive
criticism or as I like to call it = Bull$h!t
The danger, at
first, is that you may not know which is which and if you receive mean-hearted
unconstructive criticism you may abandon your dream altogether. Remember when
you were a kid and you had a dream? It’s happened to all of us at one point or
another in our lives. You had a dream and some mean-spirited adult masquerading
as well meaning told you that no matter what you did or how hard you tried you
would never accomplish it. They convinced you that they knew best and because
of X, Y or Z you could never achieve your goals.
It could have
been that jealous theater teacher in high school who was a teacher and not an
actor because they themselves failed at becoming famous. Or perhaps it was a
parent who didn’t want you to be a police officer because you may get hurt in
the line of duty so they told you that you were too out of shape. It could have
been an older sister who was envious of your amazing voice and told you that
you couldn’t carry a tune. The examples are unlimited but you get the idea.
Well, the same exact thing will happen when you start to put yourself out there
as a writer, before you’re published. After you’re published even if you are crap,
they’ll tell you how fabulous you are but that’s a different blog post.
From my limited
experience I’ve found that the writers who are kind and encouraging, the ones
who take the time to build you up, pat you on the back and take you under their
wings are the successful ones. I meet a lot of writers, I talk to a lot of
writers, I attend a myriad of writing classes. The writers who I have
personally chosen to be my critique partners are kind and helpful. If they
don’t like the way I’ve written something or think I can do a better job they
tell me nicely. They don’t put me down, belittle me, condescend or patronize. A
New York Times bestselling writer in my RWA group has been one of the most
encouraging women to me and other new writers. Other women in my groups who are
both traditionally and self-published have also been kind and helpful. However,
this is not always the case, nor will it be. For every five nice, kind,
wonderful, helpful people there is always at least one a$$hole.
I count myself
lucky that I’ve only run across a couple so far. Women with obviously low self
esteem who, for no reason other than to make themselves feel better have tried
to tear my writing apart in patronizing, nasty, self inflated ways that was not
helpful to me. These people also happen to be unsuccessful, which I understand
is part of their reason for putting other writers down.
I know I have a
lot of work to do but I also know I’m a good writer. I have doubts about other
aspects of my life but not about my writing. I don’t think I’m anywhere near
great but I believe I have that potential. I’ve been writing for my entire
life. I’ve even earned quite a successful living as a writer.
I’m sharing this
because if someone who isn’t confident in their abilities or even if someone is
having a bad day; an attack on their writing could keep them from following
their dreams and that would be a huge shame. Sometimes people are taught that
constructive criticism is pointing out their faults and “helping” them to
become better writers but I disagree. If you read the definition at the top of
the page it is delivered “in a friendly manner, not in an oppositional one.”
There are ways to tell someone anything NICELY! A very well known teacher said
to me a week ago, “that’s really good writing and I like it a lot but I think
it could be even better with…” THAT’S THE KIND OF CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM YOU
SHOULD PAY ATTENTION TO! And that’s the kind you will get with a professional,
successful writers and your helpful critique partners. Please don’t settle for
anything less and please don’t take writer bashing by meanies to heart,
remember they’re the ones who suck - the life out of everyone around them because
they’re unhappy… (not you)!!!